Wednesday, May 4, 2011

No, I'M in charge

We've been cruising along quite nicely and this whole transition has gone better than I had anticipated, until last Thursday night. I guess we needed and deserved a reality check. Maryn woke up with a fever Thursday night and she had it off and on for close to five days, reaching as high as 104.6 F. We diligently Lysoled every surface that M came in contact with for fear of a hospital stay for a newborn. Her sleep habits have been worse than said newborn. Ben did end up manifesting the virus in the form of yellow crusty eyes. And of course I got a minor sore throat and runny nose. The days without my other half around to change half of the dirty diapers, bulb syringe boogie noses every hour and referee the icky hands of the two year old away from the three week old have been long. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tired...two pediatrician visits in three days, waiting 45 minutes at the Walmart pharmacy, child in arms with rising fever, only to be told they are out of erythromycin eye ointment. There have been days where I had to stop, take a deep breath and remind myself that there are droves of selfless mothers out there that have felt my exhaustion and they not only survived but WON!! I remind myself that 'I'm winning'! I'm winning here people! So, even though this little guy thinks he's in charge...I am so much bigger than him!

And then I look over and catch this and suddenly I've got a new pep in my step
Don't fool yourself kid, I'm still winning though
How we treat fever in the Cummings house
He discovered the hanging toys and appears to have a strong right hook
In addition to decontaminating our house, I have a responsibility as a mother to provide 30 minutes a day of tummy time...he likes it
And for some reason, during the 20 hours a day that I stare at my sleeping angel, my mind wanders to the future when he's all grown up. He's going to break bones, probably get in a couple fist fights, drink too much beer, drive too fast, and make his own decisions. I want to keep my baby chicks under my wing forever and hide them from all the scary people in this world. Just because we are short one Bin Laden, doesn't mean there aren't thousands or more just like him out there or maybe they're even being born right now. I think about those Navy SEALS who risked their own lives to protect ours and all I keep thinking is that they were once a momma's sleeping angel too. We can't hold their hands forever but you better believe I'll be holding them as long as he lets me.


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